Fire, Mudslides, Earthquakes?

Armageddon?

Well we are sitting comfortably in our home here in London and the news keeps getting worse. First it was the fires, then it was the earthquake, and now the mudslides. What the hell is going on over there. I'm just waiting for the locusts to invade to make my prediction a reality. You see I have a theory that God is punishing all of the residents of Yorba Linda the same way he punished New Orleans a few years back. Let me specify just incase there is some confusion. You see I actually think that God does hate certain people. I believe that he hates people that take his ideas and turn that into judgement and hatred towards others. Now lets look at New Orleans, where the hurricane struck with ferocity. When the venerated pastor John Hagee of the 16,000 member Cornerstone Church in Texas said that the hurricane was God punishing the residents of New Orleans for permitting homosexuality and other forms of debauchery I don't think he was far off. The only problem with his argument is that the areas he especially pointed out, mainly the French Quarter (where they had a gay pride parade just days before the hurricane struck) remained largely untouched. In fact, almost all of the areas that we associate the "drunken, homosexual, debauchery" were not directly affected by the hurricane itself. You see, the French Quarter sits just a bit above sea level, high enough that the flood waters did not invade that area of the city. Now either God had a poor sense of direction, in which case he is not omnipotent, or omniscient making him relatively inconsequential anyways, or, as I believe, he is purposely leaving the drunken homosexuals alone.

Now lets take the case of Yorba Linda. Could God be punishing the residents of Yorba Linda for their deeds? The answer is yes. I believe that God sees in Yorba Linda a group of very conservative, flag waving, Sarah Palin sticker wearing, gay hating, Muslim hating, pretty much hating anything that doesn't look or think or talk exactly as they do, group of people. This made God angry and he directed his special powers to lay the smack-down on good ole' Yorba Linda. Let me also give you some proof. My parents (who by-the-way love the gays, and the Jews for that matter), are not hateful people and often engage in drunken debauchery. They did not vote for McCain/Palin, and they do not think that people who look or act different than them are going to hell. Their house did not burn down, although God could have directed a few embers onto the roof with the snap of a finger, he didn't. He could have had their house swept away in a mudslide, but he didn't. He could have demolished their house with an earthquake, but he didn't. Just a little comforting proof that God is not on the side of those malicious hateful people.

Now I also have some quick remedies to help the residents of Yorba Linda avoid the future disasters of plague and locust invasion (not in that order). First of all, take the Sarah Palin sticker off of your Hummer, and throw away all of your "Left Behind" series books. Second, lobby the city council to overturn the ban on bar's and saloon's in Yorba Linda because apparently God keeps his hands off the areas where copious amounts of liquor are consumed. After that, strategically place a bar where the city may be susceptible to such disasters as fire or flood. Finally, have the biggest gay-pride parade this side of the Mississippi. That might get God's attention, he may even turn his wrath to Irvine or Newport Beach which have somehow slipped under his "hate-radar". So in closing, if you want to get on God's good side, move close to a bar and go to a gay pride parade. Remember, God is watching.

A nice walk in the cemetery

Us in the park on the way.

The Park.

Kristin + park.

Nick + Park

Great day for a walk in the cemetery!

Some of the old cemetery roads.

Kristin admiring the dead.

Where the hell is the groundskeeper?

They literally buried these people on top of each other.

We finally found the inconspicuous grave of good ole' Karl Marx.

Lets see if you can pick out which one is his.

The weather was perfectly creepy for a cemetery visit.

Packed House.

I like the one on the right, it's subtle yet to the point.

So here are just a few pictures from our recent walk at Highgate Cemetery. This is where Karl Marx is buried as well as many other very prominent Londoners. Nothing really new to report from our side, let us know how you are doing if you get a chance, give us a call or shoot us an email. Hope to hear from you soon.

MAC IS BACK, MAC IS BACK, MAC IS BACK !!!!!!!

In the Senate that is....Thank GOD!

Well for the first time in a long time I am very proud to be an American. I think it is ok to say that you are not proud of some of the things your country does when you believe those things are wrong. In the past eight years I have not been proud of very many things that we have done as a country, in fact I have been down right ashamed of some of the things we have done. We must criticize our government at times we think that very government is taking the people it serves in the wrong direction. I think it is the most patriotic thing you can do as an American, be vigilant and critical of things you disagree with. 

I also suspect that many of those people that said it was un-American to be critical of our government at a time of crisis will now begin to criticize unrelentingly. This is to be expected, and for the first time in a very long time I think that we will have an administration and a government that will not only listen to the critics, but take their point of view into account when making serious decisions that affect the entire country.

It was especially interesting and enlightening to have viewed such a critical and important election in our history from abroad. People here and all over the world were pulling for Obama to win, and I think that says something. What we as Americans do in the world affects billions of others around the globe. For the past eight years the world has watched as the United States has engaged in some of the most destructive and careless policy possible. 

In electing Barack Obama we have shown the world that we are still capable of being a rational nation, and that we can make the good decisions necessary to lead in this world. I am so happy and proud that I finally had a candidate that I truly wanted to vote for and not just a president that I wanted to vote against. I did not feel as though I was just voting to keep the crazy old angry guy and the idiot governor out of office, but rather voting for the best possible choice to run this country. For the first time in a long time the American people did not have to choose the best of the worst, but we actually voted for the best of the best. 

OK, enough of my rant, I promise that all future blogs will at least make an attempt to be humorous. 

Kristin and I also went to an election party to watch the results come in. There were about 500-600 people there and we had a great time. I have posted a video of some of the results coming in so you can see what it was like to be an American in London on election night. Sorry for the poor quality and shaky video, I was fairly intoxicated by the time we got any real results, and that created a bad video and an even worse hangover the next day. We stayed up celebrating and drinking champagne until about 4am here. My German friend Andreas was with us to experience the American (or maybe just Perrone) tradition of drinking on election night until the results don't matter because the American people have proven in the past that a little over 50% of them are pretty poor decision makers. This actually was a bad idea, because by the time the results started to come in I was REALLY intoxicated. Now four or eight years ago this approach proved to work pretty well. You see if you get really drunk the results don't matter all that much, you get angry, rant a bit, pop in a frozen pizza, and go to bed. You are even too hung over the next day to listen to Bush talk about "political capital" on MSNBC. Overall it's a great strategy if your candidate doesn't win. So I will take this into consideration for the next election.

For those of you that voted for Obama, thank you!

For those of you that voted for McCain, I guess you now realize that your vote really doesn't count all that much. This is true, and if you choose to abstain from voting from here on out the rest of us will understand. In fact, if I were you I would never vote again.

McCain/Palin 08'

Ok, so Kristin and I have been doing a lot of talking about the election and we have finally decided to cast our vote for John McCain and Sarah Palin. I know this surprises a lot of you but let me explain why.

First of all Kristin and I have chosen to have careers in the educational field, notably higher education, and we think that John McCain's plan will serve us best. After eight years of an absolute idiot of a president we think that if we help to elect not only another idiot vice president, but a senile old bastardly president we will have more success in our field. You see with the effective dumbing down of our country over the last eight years and hopefully more to come, we will have an increasingly massive pool of people to try and educate. With no shortage of clientele we will ensure not only an easier job, but long and fruitful careers. We have decided to forego the better pay and health insurance options put forth by Obama for the assurance of millions and millions of idiots to be able to educate.

The second reason is that my sister, whom I love and want to see become as successful as possible, will be entering the nursing profession in due time and McCain's plan will definately benefit her and her beautiful family. You see with a healthcare plan that ensures that a family of four will have a $5,000 tax credit to choose their very own healthcare plan, John McCain will make sure that no family in America will be insured for more than 5 months a year (Average healthcare costs in the US for a family of four is $12,100 per year). This plan will ensure that people who are sick or have serious symptoms will wait as long as possible until they get treatment. Once they do get treatment, it will cost 2 or (hopefully) even 3 times as much as early or preventative care. With this plan there will surely be millions upon millions of very sick people to treat, making positive that my sister's wages are inflated and the work plentiful.

The third reason is that my parents are looking to possibly purchase a piece of property in California. They have worked hard their entire lives and saved accordingly. You see our economy is like an old Ford pickup truck that has been driven deep into a ditch, and what John McCain wants to do is hook that pickup truck up to a winch and drag it even further , not into a ditch, but into quicksand that is filled with scorpions to make sure that there are no survivors. Once the economy is firmly entrenched and festering with deadly scorpions my parents will definitely be able to afford their dream house. You see by further clamping down on those pesky middle class homeowners with tax cuts for the rich, home prices will be driven down even further through massive home foreclosures. This will ensure that my parents will find the home they want, at a price they can afford (But what if they have to pay for healthcare, increasing energy costs, and other rising prices? Oh, don't worry I'm sure McCain will think of something, Maybe Sarah Palin can flash one of those cute winks at the Chinese and Saudi investors that own so much of our debt, and they will help us pay for this stuff....ya that's a great idea! If Joe Biden winked at the Saudi's we'd have another war on our hands, just one more reason to vote McCain).

The fourth and final reason is the most convincing for me. John McCain apparently has a new member of his staff that I feel I can really relate to. This man is hard working, wears mock turtleneck's, and claims that a "vote for Obama is a vote for the death to Israel". John McCain claims that this man is his idol. He also says that when he is elected to the White House he is taking this man with him to Washington (to presumably make sure that the toilets are all working properly). This man is Joe the plumber. Who is Joe the "a vote for Obama is a vote for the death to Israel" plumber? Well he is a great American hero. He is a man who is not planning to buy a company but says he is (now that's American ambition). He is a man with a publicist, looking for a book deal, and a country music contract (WOW, a true American!). He is also so hard working that he manages to work as a plumber by day and attend John McCain rallies by night (well he actually attends the rallies during the day so... I don't know when he actually does his unlicensed plumbing). So john McCain has chosen to surround himself with Real Americans like the idiot from Alaska, and the average plumber/con-artist, and not these high culture, "educated", "intelligent", "experienced" people that Obama has chosen to surround himself with. Stupid Democrats.

So in closing, with a country full of increasingly sick and infectious idiots who will lose their houses, healthcare, and self respect, my family will prosper. For that reason vote McCain/Palin.